You broke up with her. She didn’t get the memo. Now she’s showing up places, texting from new numbers, and apparently has your work schedule memorized. Breaking up was supposed to be the hard part, but here you are, needing an exit strategy from someone who already got exited.
Here’s how to make it stick.
1. Go Dark on Contact
New phone number. New email. Do it now, not next week when you’ve "had time to think about it." She’ll get your new number eventually (mutual friends, social media detective work, carrier pigeon), but you’re buying yourself weeks of peace. That’s the goal.
Block her on everything first. Phone, Instagram, Facebook, LinkedIn if she’s the type. Don’t leave gaps.
2. Fill Your Calendar So She Can’t
Free time is enemy territory right now. An empty schedule means you’re sitting at home, vulnerable to doorbell ambushes and "I was just in the neighborhood" drop-bys. Book yourself solid. Yoga, happy hours, weekend trips, whatever. The point isn’t self-improvement, it’s being legitimately unavailable.
If you bump into her in public, keep it to one sentence. "Hey" works. Don’t ask how she’s doing, don’t explain where you’re headed. Definitely don’t rehash the breakup in the cereal aisle at Trader Joe’s. She’ll try to bait you into a conversation. Don’t bite.
And stop responding to texts from unknown numbers. You know it’s her.
3. Get Legal If She Won’t Back Off
Restraining order. It sounds dramatic, but if she’s genuinely stalking you (showing up at your home repeatedly, following you, threatening behavior), it’s not overkill. Document everything first. Screenshots, dates, witnesses. You’ll need evidence.
Once it’s filed, she has to stay away. If she doesn’t, she gets arrested. Most people stop when it gets that official.
